Talking to a parent is hard at any age.
When you have to talk about touchy subjects with an elderly parent, it often leads to frustration and anger on both sides. There are four topics that are more likely to lead to arguments. Don’t put them off. Talk about these subjects with your mom sooner rather than later.
Does She Have an Advanced Directive and Medical Power of Attorney Arranged?
She may not feel it’s necessary, but things can happen in a flash. Your mom should have drawn up paperwork that clarifies her wishes in terms of things like life-saving measures if she can’t speak for herself. She also needs to designate a medical power of attorney to make decisions for her if her mental or physical abilities make it impossible for her to make them on her own.
Would She Let You Attend Her Medical Appointments?
As your mom ages, it helps if you’re there to talk to her doctor after her health exam. You’re going to have pertinent information into prescriptions your mom receives and health issues she faces. Your mom may see it as an infringement of her privacy.
If she is willing to let you, you need a HIPAA form signed that gives your mom’s doctor permission to share information with you. That form is available at your mom’s doctor’s office. Make sure it’s on file.
Has She Considered What Happens With Her Pets?
As your mom ages, it may be too hard for her to properly care for her pets. It’s likely she’s assuming you’ll take them. In a perfect world that would be an easy solution, but you may already have pets. You may not be allowed to have pets per your association or lease rules.
You don’t want her pets to end up on the streets, but you may not be able to rehome them without per permission. You need her to go with you to a rescue or shelter. Otherwise, the power of attorney paperwork for the property is necessary to prove you have the legal authority to rehome them.
If Elder Care is Needed, What Are Her Preferences?
Elder care can be a tricky discussion. To seniors, the need for home care seems like a loss of abilities and freedom. You, however, do need to know what she would prefer. Would she want to hire someone on her own or use an agency? Would she want family members providing some of her care?
Involve your mom in a conversation with an elder care specialist. It can help if your mom gets to hear from others what her options would be in different situations. Call today.